♥ welcome to personal online diary~
this is where i express myself openly..
purely juz to let anyone tat cares abt part & parcel of my life..
im juz any ordinary human tat wishes to haf frens tat cares..
but plz dun nag at me!!
cos i could get reali down everytime someone do tat to me~
den i might fcuk the hell out of him/her!!
so shut the bloody fcuk up if u noe hell shit!!!!
u mother fcukin son of a peach isnt needed in my life
xiao_converse@hotmail.com single attached
siAng wEi,
graCe,
jaiMe,
gweN,
xiumEi,
jeNny,
eiLeEn,
weNdy,
zirUi,
sihUi,
luxuAn,
miNdy,
yeHyiNg,
pEiLing,
longlong,
 
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im a terrible boifren isnt it?~ tag ur ans if ya wan.. Monday, August 3, 2009 @ 8/03/2009 10:01:00 AM
ytd is rather a reali surprisin day.. 3aug~ 3 person i noe happened to haf their b'day ytd.. 1 is lau kf.. another is pam.. lastly.. captain younger sis oso~ but thus.. it weren't a great day for me.. wake up in the afternoon den went out eat as im hungry.. den mit captain tok cock at his hse downstair.. reach hm played "fish a fish" for awhile.. msn wif few frens den i tink its time to go lala land le.. later today will start work at orchard ion~ 2pm till 6pm.. frens if free can drop by to find me.. haiz.. msg laopo juz now askin for her offday when.. she say ytd & wed.. i was like wat the hell.. she didn msg me out lor.. haiz.. felt reali so disappointed.. rather emo oso cos 2 of my best pal juz brokeup wif their gal in a wk.. i noe its none of my business but still.. i felt reali bad for dem~ drank abit wif tat bastard the nite b4 tis.. got abit drunk but luckily didn puke.. always tend to lose myself in balancin things in life~ or is it too demandin to haf frens, galfren, family & work at the same time? family wise i reali dunno wat i could do.. its isnt within my abilities to help.. frens wise i already doin my very very best to maintain.. but still.. im always the irritatin clown makin a fool out of myself.. galfren wise i reali dunno.. i reali luv her but sometimes she reali makes me so pissed off.. is it reali juz bcos she is juz too young for me or wat?! i reali appreciate the way she let me haf my own freedom & doin her part to earn her own money for the things she wan.. althru tat i offer to buy instead but she still insist to buy for herself~ fcuk la.. i reali hate myself can~ i seems like forcin her to grow up to fit into my expectations.. tis r/s is my longest r/s.. i oso dunno is it the reason y i dun bear to let go b tis or is it tat i still believe tat she will grow up someday.. everybody will grow up de isnt it.. and get mature 1 day de isnt it.. so when will b hers? i understand tat no one is perfect for each other de.. one will haf to change for the other.. so y m i so selfish to let her b the person tat haf 2 change for me?! m i reali too da nan ren le ma? mayb yes.. after so much r/s i guess i reali is 1.. so now.. after all tis 1yr goin 8mths.. so much of luv & pain involved.. bein "understandin" or not tat she is reali so young for me.. sld i juz let go? i believe it will hurt both parties.. but at least the hurt will not lasts too long as i did nth sorry to u.. mayb tats 1 of the reason y i didn wat-so-ever wif ya.. i always dunno where im headin in a r/s.. trust u given me.. luv u oso given me.. but still.. u nv reali understand how i feelin within.. a msg or call at nite tat u reached hm safely after work turn out to b like a trouble for ya.. always muz wait for me to ask b4 u tell me wat happened.. hello.. i noe tis goin 2yrs isnt reali long.. but plz at least treat me as ur boi can?! some casual msg tat u goin where or doin wat.. missin me anot already makes me happy already.. but always.. u nv done so.. its always me msgin u 1st.. mayb u r reali too bz balancin ur work & studies now.. i oso dunno how u felt everyday already.. u dun blog still nvm.. but even a tag in my blog oso dun haf.. if u gonna say u dun use the com everyday den fine.. but y u dun even msg or call me tellin me hows ur day den.. cant spare ur boifren a min or 2 of ur day?! the onli time i can noe is when goin out wif u occasionali when we 2 r free thru chattin.. haiz.. i guess i reali tink too much.. but frankly.. tats all the feelin i felt for ya.. im nv another me infront of u.. like it anot.. im always me infront of u.. i juz dun wanna u to regret as times goes on.. a small mistake could led to a lifetime regret~ lets juz tok things out when u r free den.. i dun wish 2 b selfish to make such a fatal decision without concernin how u reali felt & wants~ kkz.. im reali sleepy le.. gonna go slp le.. later gonna start a new workin environment le finali~ wish me gd luck.. :)
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